The Old Evangelist

A friend that has recently gone through a traumatic divorce in ministry wrote an email and told me about the secret of a great evangelist, Smith Wigglesworth, who had a heart of compassion: he said to someone, 'I am a broken hearted person: I miss my wife so much, but it keeps my heart soft towards God and people.'
Then I thought of a song my parents used to sing in church, 'He died of a broken heart for me'. As a kid the song had sad tones, but I did not have the savvy to grasp the intent.
I often got full marks for writing essays in Afrikaans. In fact, when the teacher wrote the topics on the board I used to write essays on all topics and often even suggest some topics to the teachers! I wrote note books full of essays, and sometimes when I read them to my willing mother, I used to cry while reading to her! Sentimental? Romantic? Perhaps, but I have learned that a soft heart can touch other hearts...
The Question is, how do I keep my heart soft? A hard heart is unbearable...to have and to live with. Bitterness of heart, unforgiveness, unbelief, hatred...all these things make a heart hard. Such a hard heart cannot produce a good crop. It spoils the seed of the word of God and when persecution comes for the word's sake it has no depth and the plant withers and dies in the heat of the sun...
Well, the seed of the word of Life can also be choked by the deceitfulness of riches, the anxieties of life and the desire for other things creeping into a heart. The good soil is the soul that is soft towards God, that understands, and it produces 30, 60 and 100 fold harvests!
That's from the parable of the sower.
Back to Smith Wigglesworth. He was a rasping bully of a man who treated his wife so badly that he often locked her out of the house because she went to church. When he woke up to get the daily newspaper and bottle of milk on the porch she would get up and greet him kindly. Her prayers and soft heart eventually broke his hard heart and he converted and became a preacher - a great preacher! He raised 22 people from the dead, apparently!
But his wife died not to long after that and obviously he missed her - he must have had memories of how he treated her! Obviously he wanted to make up for his foul behaviour and somehow he translated this into good deeds for others.
It was a known fact that he often wept when he asked people how their spouses or children were.
He had some things that softened his heart. He knew who he was and what he had done. He had received forgiveness, but the memory of the one who remained kind and patient with him, kept his heart soft throughout his lonely ministry years.
Don't we all have some things that could make our hearts soft? Or do we persist in having hard hearts? All of us have things that we wished we had not done, and things we hated when others did it to us. But we can turn these memories into our favour and let them soften instead of harden our hearts, by forgiveness. Sometimes we have to forgive ourselves...often!
How frail we mortals be!
But my friend shared his broken heartedness with me and I throught about it - if it softens our hearts, then a broken heart is a good thing...
Then again, Jesus is anointed to heal the broken hearted and set the captives free! But the memory of his kindness and patience towards us all makes me weep, at times, and keeps my heart soft! Patience and kindness are after all the first two qualities of divine love as defined in I Corinthians 13:4-9 (Its worth reading!)
So, what has broken your heart, my dear? What has caused you grief? Are you going to let it make you bitter and twisted and harden your heart or are you going to use it to soften your heart so that you can have compassion on others - like the old evangelist?
Those who sow in tears, shall reap in joy!
One day the Lord will wipe away our tears and say, 'well done, good and faithful servant, enter into the Joy of the Lord!' What a day that will be!

What a transporting moment of joy it will be
When we meet face to face
The One we have known heart to heart
All these years!

No arrests for emotional abuse

Parents who abuse their children emotionally cannot get caught or be imprisoned. Physical abuse is punishable by law, but what is worse? Physical pain that eventually recovers or emotional scars that stay forever?
My daughter Yvette wrote a play about emotional abuse and won a prize for the best script for drama. She also directed this physical theatre piece and won acclaim for it. When we went to watch it, I saw grown men weep in front of me - the one had tatoes on his muscular shoulders and wore a white vest. His head was shaven and he had a goatie beard. He was a really tough looking character, but his heart was deeply touched by what he saw on stage...
One amazing theatrical touch to portray the harshness of the mother towards her daughter was nothing short of brilliant, even though I say so! Instead of having water in a sink bath tub to wash the daughter they filled it with rice. Yes, rice! When the mother used the rice to scrub her daughter's body and rinse her curly hair, the effect was tangible in the audience...people squirmed in their seats, feeling the callousness of the woman who felt nothing for her own flesh and blood.
The play is simply called, 'And then she cried...' and the actress Liezl won the best actress award at AFDA in Observatory. A couple we invited also wept during the performance. It was too close to reality. The husband was treated like that by his mother.
How many homes are there where children are mistreated by parents? How many homes are not broken? How many parents are not divorced? How many homes have peace and joy? In how many homes is there constant fighting and swearing? How many children suffer under the hatred their parents have for each other? Where, oh where, is love?
The youth dilinquency problem is an indictment against parents. In Scotland more kids run away from home than anywhere else. I saw it on TV and read about it in the newspapers. When the police caught a girl that ran away from home they asked her why she did it?
'I don't want to be at home anymore. Any place is better than home. My parents always fight and hit me. I am always alone at home during the day. They are never there. When they come home they fight. I hate it. I want to go somewhere else.'
Where is home sweet home? Where is the Christian ideal of a family? Has the church failed to produce Christian homes in the world? Then the church's doctrine has obviously veered off the beaten track and adhered to the teachings of men, rather than the doctrine of God. Perhaps the church is to blame for the mess the homes are in. Perhaps the church needs to reform before we think of reforming the world.
Yvette wrote the play based on stories she heard about what my wife went through in her parent's home. She read up about emotional abuse and drew from her research as well and put it together in a play. I want to make a movie about it - no matter how painful it is, because the world needs to know...
Day by day, we meet young children with pain in their hearts because they have been emotionally abused by their parents...
And children are innocent, they are quick to forgive, they trust so easily - yet once they are broken they end up with diseases, physically and mentally and the shocks they had to live through spoil the rest of their lives...
Does God care about children? To them belong the kingdom of heaven. If anyone harms the least of them, they are touching the heart of God.
We need to train parents, educate parents....Crosby, Stills & Nash sing, 'Teach your children' and halfway through the song they change the line to, 'Teach your parents well, your father's hell will slowly go by...'
Today is a good day to bring about a change in our lives at home. Today is a good day to appreciate each other. Today is a good day to hug our children and tell them we love and appreciate them, no matter how well they perform at school or in sport or playing their instruments of music.
Schools have become so demanding that children hardly have time to be kids anymore...that is why they break out over weekends and do silly things...
Many African children are tired of all the funerals and endless church meetings they have to attend every weekend...they have no time for themselves anymore.
We have to stop this madness and call out for help for all the children suffering emotional abuse in their homes, in boarding schools and those who have no homes...just like rolling stones...
Bob Dylan sings, 'How does it feel to be without a home, in the great unknown...just like a rolling stone!'

Breaking the sound barrier

The brilliant movie The Right Stuff depicts the courage of pilots who pushed through the sound barrier with ill-equipped air craft that almost fell apart in their effort to fly at new speeds. There are unforgettable scenes of nerve wrecking, riveting excitement as men defy all odds to enter new dimensions of flight. This determination eventually led to space craft and put the first man on the moon!
Pushing the envelope has become common terminology once Hollywood got hold of it - because they only do it in movies! In the unreal world of the cinema anything is possible and the Sc-Fi movies prove that. Nobody believes what they are seeing anymore and the stunts of ordinary actors and actresses with invisible ropes and safety gadgets are no longer impressive to the cinema boffin who now knows that the flames and fires in movies are not real and nobody can really dodge bullets as in the Matrix - its all trick photography and the cameramen compete for the Oscar!
But there are still real men out there...there women...real people who are not 'pushing the envelope' but breaking through in whatever field they are involved it in order to bring new hope and blessing to a tired, worn-out world (Sting's phrase in 'The River Flows...down to the sea').
In order to push through in something you have to have True Grit (A John Wayne movie for which he won an Oscar!) and a fierce determination to succeed.
From an early age we learn to ride a bicycle...at first our conscious minds desperately try to master the two-wheeler and many falls and hurts later we find a way to balance and stay on top!
And voila! There you go - full speed ahead.
The same applies for driving a car - at first the nervousness of trying to concentrate on all the pedals and movements of changing gears and co-ordinating it all - a nightmare at first, but soon everyone is speaking with cell phones and driving at the same time with a CD playing in the back ground and then they still wave at friends passing by in the traffic! Amazing...
Pilots do it...first in simulators then in the real deal...the other day my plane wobbled when it tried to land in a terrifying head wind at Edinburgh airport and the wings almost hit the tarmac before the pilot had the presence of mind to take off again and circle...I prayed for the winds to cease...and they did. So together we (the Lord, the pilot and I) did a splendid job providing the safety of the passengers!
Then when I returned home, on the 6 O' Clock News, Nola and I saw a Lufthanza plane going through the same motion my plane experienced - only this time the wing hit the ground and the plane spun around and someone had a video camera handy to film it and sell it to the broadcasting station! The pilot made a U-turn and took the plane back on the runway to avoid overturning and crashing it! It takes a certain kind of steel nerve to be a pilot - with 300 lives in your hands!
When we were small (and Christmas trees were tall...B-Gees, remember?) we used to sing, Jesus Saviour, pilot me! Now I understand a bit better...
But it takes a plunge of faith for a mother and father to raise their children in the fear and admonition of the Lord in these days! It takes a holy fervour to live a sanctified life amongst all the perversion and corruption we face in the media every day.
It takes a church with schutzpah to reform from traditions to God's standards given in Paul's apostolic epistles.
It takes a lot of practice to be a good batsman or bowler. It takes a lot of practice to be a good musician that can flow prophetically when the Spirit moves...
But we have to push those boundaries back!
What are you facing that you can push further? Take courage and do it! God is with you!

Characters on the Tube

The characters on the tube that caught my attention did so, largely because I was sitting opposite them in the train and had nowhere else to fasten my attention except on the explanation of the Piccadilly line in London's underground system. The group I observed were a admixture of a cosmopolitan United Nations!
On the left we have the Iranese (Lebanese?) Mid-eastern mischle bound rough neck with a shaven head and bulging arm muscles, strong hands, large nose and thick lips...but fast asleep and harmless with his head leaning against the glass partition separating the compartment from the sliding doors. On the right hand side (and imagine these two prize fighters in a ring!) we have the well-dressed English businessman, thoroughly modern with suit and white shirt, but tie-less as the Europeans do! He stares straight ahead of him, into nothingness, as if no one else exists.
Next to him is a Turkish girl, poor but hopeful to make it in her new homeland, which is foreign to her. She takes out a little hand mirror and does her eye make-up as if now one is watching and admires herself by turning her head from side to side and pouting her lips.
Adjacent to her is a heavy metal freak with tatoos all over his body, sporting a bandana with black and white skulls. When he stepped into the train he chose to sit on that seat where the Daily Tube Newspaper was lying. Instead of picking it up he sat on it, probably to show his defiance against society as a whole. His face is flaky and his nose red and sore from all the nose rings matching his ear and lip rings. He looks like a display window in a pawn shop with all the rings on his dirty fingers with nails that are equally spoiled and black! His walkman blasts the music into his ears at such ear piercing volume that the rest of us have to endure the overflow of the noise!
Then, quite out of character, he opens his black sling bag (it has to be black!) and takes out...wait for it...a Time Magazine and reads it with great interest!
When he got up the Turkish girl grabbed the crumpled up newspaper, straightened it out and showed off her skill of reading a newly acquired language, but it is obviously not great because she paged quite rapidly through the newspaper.
The businessman next to her strayed and peeped at the headlines for a while, before correcting himself and looking straight ahead again. But it wasn't long until he strayed again and this time kept reading over her shoulder for longer spells, the two of them making a silent duet!
In the middle perched a wannabe model with matching high collared black coat, black slacks and black silk stockings, grandiose make up, matching rings and hair decorations, designer sling bag over the shoulder resting on her lap...but her shoes gave her away...brown hush puppies! This suggested that she had a long way to walk to work - which wasn't doing modelling at all!
Bleak House sat next to her. Well, meaning by that, of course, a dull looking up-town girl with no effort at all to do make-up except an eye-liner. You get the message: make-up takes so long to put on and you only have to take it all off again at night when you get home, so why bother in the first place?
The only other person that could fit on that line of seats was an Easter-European with a slit-eyed expression of a Russian Mafia mobster that never looked at anything or anyone. Perhaps he was on a life-threatening mission?
Then a thought occurred to me: 'And God loves them all!'
Who could love a muscle bound rough neck from the Middle East? God does.
Who could love a boring English gentleman? God does.
Who could love a wannabe model who will never make the grade? God does.
Who would love the working class girl with no make-up? God does.
And who would love a mobster from Eastern Europe? God does.
And the heavy metal freak? God loves him too!
So, if God could love all these characters on the Tube Train in London, he could surely love you and me as well? Just a thought for the day...

The Crumbling Flake

Nothing is as brittle or as tempting as flake, Cadbury's flake chocolate, that is! Open one up and put it in front of any person and before long the flake will have its way! Its so different from other slabs of chocolate, so easy on the tongue and so satisfying! It is simply irresistable!
We used to have a saying, 'that's the way the cookie crumbles' in the old days. But I think we need to upgrade it to, 'that's the way the flake crumbles!' In the old days the cookie jar was the forbidden territory for boys and it was placed on the highest shelf in the pantry and only opened at special occasions - when there were visitors.
But every boy (and girl) sooner or later discovered the treasure jar and tried to get up there, by stacking chairs on top of each other or climbing up the racks and pulling things down in the process!
Sting sang 'How Fragile We Are' with a nice bossanova rhythm to it. It was somewhat of a tear jerker and we all thought, how true, how true!
Yet with escalating violence and crime in every nation of the world, wars and rumours of wars, it seems that humankind has forgotten how brittle we really are. Not soft, but brittle.
I know Cowboys don't cry and real men are hard, but the Man of all Men also wept on occasions. the shortest verse in the bible is, 'And Jesus wept'. He was at the grave of Lazarus, his friend, who died four days ago but he had no inside information to go there. He only did what His Father in Heaven told him to do. When he arrived on the scene, Martha and Mary both scolded him for coming so late: if you had been here he would not have died!
And so He cried. He cried because of their unbelief that He is the Resurrection and the Life. He cried because He found it hard to explain to people who He really was. He found it hard that they refused to believe in Him. He also felt sorry for his friend having to go through this ordeal. But it did reveal the brittle state of life: his friend passed away and he wept.
Funny how funerals bring out different things in different people.
I spoke at a funeral of an African lady in Stellenbosch last year and saw how the family and friends loaded bunches of bouquest of flowers around the coffin and how they praised her for about three hours and gave money to her family and told the whole world what a great person she was. Afterwards they slaughtered some cattle for a mighty funeral party! It must have cost an arm and a leg to pay for all the entertainment - ala African style.
When I was given five minutes to say something, I only needed two. This is what I said: 'Why do you wait till someone is dead before you give her flowers? Why do you wait till someone's dead before you praise her and tell others what a wonderful person she was? Why do you wait till someone is dead before you give them money? Why don't you give flowers while someone is alive?' And then, I sat down. I did not cry. I just sat down.
As we walked out of the hall, young people grabbed me by the arm and whispered: 'thanks!' Outside a grey headed old man leaning on his knob kierie took me aside and said, 'what you said here today needs to be spoken all over Africa! We honour the dead more than the living!' The young people came to me and said, 'we are so sick and tired of all the funerals we have to go to every Saturday and the funerals are all day! We have no life of our own! We work six days a week and then have to go to funerals of family and friends, because if you don't go they say you dishonour the dead person. And Sundays we have to go to church and you know our services - they last for 5 hours!' I heard the cry of the youth and that made me want to cry!
Traditions are squeezing the life out of the youth of our country!
Who will liberate them? Who will tell them life is more important than death? Even though life is brittle and can end at any moment?
It is the brittle state of life that makes us seek a strong tower, a place of refuge, a rock of defense, someone like our Lord Jesus Christ, who is a help that has been tested in many ways ans never found wanting.
He took on the brittle state of human life in order to feel what it was like to be a man, and then he said, he has compassion on us, he is touched by the feelings of our infirmities, because he was tempted in all points like as we are, yet without sin! Absolutely astonishing that he went through all the temptations without ever giving in to anyone! That is why all the Da Vinci codes and other conspiracy theories are constantly trying to prove that he had to have some secret love affairs in the silent years and that he must have had children born out of wedlock - and such rubbish!
But here was a man that would not give in to an open flake in front of him! He understood the brittleness of it all and conquered it in order to succour us in times of testing and trials.
By the way, I have just finished the flake Nola put in front of me before I started blogging! Go and enjoy one too, because Jesus paid the price for us and overcame everything so that we can be free to live life depending on His grace and His power to help us overcome things in our own lives.
There's nothing flaky about the Gospel of Jesus Christ! Nothing at all! It is solid and it helps us in our flaky human existence to find solace and comfort at all times, knowing that He cares for us and understands us better that we can understand ourselves.

My Servant Shall Succeed!

My servant shall succeed in his task and be highly honoured. This is a prophecy in the book of Isaiah that my mother sent me throughout her lifetime. Whenever I got discouraged, whenever I did not know which way to turn; when it looked like all was lost and that my life was going nowehre; when there was no financial profit in all the things I did; when I was rejected by the church leaders and my ideas squashed; when I wanted to throw in the towel on many occasions she would simply cut out a piece of paper on which she typed the words on her old black Remmington type writer with the black and red ribbon: 'My servant shall succeed in his task!'

Being a missionary in the modern world without the backing of any organization who want to own you and squeeze you into their own mould, is certainly not an easy task! You never budget because you do not know where the money is going to come from this year! You never plan a holiday because you do not know who is going to offer a holiday home for you in December! There is no pension scheme, nor medical aid - it is a journey of total faith - and praise God for His grace and mercy, I have travelled this path for over 35 years now, 30 with a wife and family and I can testify with confidence: it works to trust God for everything! But I admit it is not for the fainthearted or squeemish.

If God decided you are going to be successful - then everything will work together for your good if you love Him and you are called according to His purpose, which is to be conformed to the image of His Son, Jesus Christ, the first born among many brothers.

The secret lies in the fact that you have to choose to become God's servant. It is His servant that shall succeed in His task.

Ephesians 2 tells us that we are the workmanship of God who created us for a specific task and how he empowers us to complete that task successfully. He created good works for us to walk in. So your divine design is actually the secret of success - not just wordly drive and selfish motivation!

I once wondered what the Lord meant by telling his disciples to look at the lillies of the field and the birds in the air...then I went to sit on the side of Table Mountain where there are a lot of lillies every day for a few hours and just look and lie on my back and watch the bird in the air. I pondered and meditated but didn't quite get it.

Suddenly the revelation came to me one day - unexpectedly! The lillies are where they are supposed to be and the birds are where they are supposed to be! Only the surrelaist painter Salvador Dali would paint lillies in the air and birds planted in the ground!

Lillies do not try to be birds and birds do not try to be lillies. In being what they were created to be they do not have to toil or labour and the Creator sees to it that they are clothed and fed! To feed all the sparrows in America would bankrupt the governmnet in no time! God takes good care of his creatures.

So in order to be God's servant we should first of all learn to be ourselves, first. Then we can do what we were designed to do and have success as a result. Success is not a place you arrive at. It is a lifestyle.

Moses told Joshua to meditate in the word day and night and to observe what to do and then he would make his way prosperous and have good success. After Moses passed away God repeated the same words to the young man. Read the book of Joshua to see what he accomplished through meditation in the Holy Scriptures!

All I wanted to do was to play professional cricket and be an actor! There was no such thing as professional cricket when I was young (a bit before my time) so I became an actor. After many years I became a missionary. While in Australia I heard these words on the inside: prophetic actor! I became a preacher that acts out the prophetic word of God when I preach - and I still help to coach cricket wherever I can!

So, by just being honest with who I really was, I was enabled to raise a family, by the grace of God and to put my children through school, bible school and university. The youngest one is still at school. It is a miracle if you consider that most places I go to as a missionary cannot afford to have me there. We do have a church called Harvester that helps me from time to time, but not all the time.

By being faithful to the call I received as a 12 year old boy when Aunty Raper the old prophetess came to our house in 65 Gardener Avenue, Brakpan, and prophesied, 'Young man you have a calling from God. God will use you in other lands!' I was able to live and raise a family! My wife needs a medal for sticking with me! But she also has a call. When met her I asked her what she wanted to do with her life. She said she would like to be a missionary and an actress. I realised that our paths were the same - and she was pretty, sporting and talented! So I popped the question and later on she accepted!

I cannot measure my success but I know I have had some success already and I do not live for one day when I am successful. I enjoy one day at a time and try to live life to the full - as a servant of the Lord, perhaps not perfect, with many shortcomings and weaknesses, but at least sold out to be a servant of the Lord and willing to go to other nations.

What is it that you were designed to do? What is in your heart, if you are honest? A man's gift will make room for him: wherever it turns it prospers! My gift is to talk to groups of people, on stage or while preaching!

The Hole in the Doughnut

I remember distinctly how Dr. Gray explained the story about the doughnut to us at Miracle Valley, Arizona - and that was in 1973! just goes to show that if a story is worth repeating it is worth repeating! (We are in 2008 now!)
There was a moment in a meeting when the Holy Spirit melted every heart and people started acknowledging their pride. A second year student at The Valley got up and summarized his feeling about himself in the following words:
'I used to think I was something. But I am nothing. Nothing at all. You know the hole in the doughnut? That's me! That's what I am - just a hole in a doughnut!'
It was very touching and everyone agreed that we are nothing compared to Christ Jesus. He is and should be everything to us.
Later that afternoon a group of students were talking about returning to do the third year of practical ministry training at The Valley. The young man who used the figure of the doughnut in his confession, indicated that he was also considering coming back for ministry training. Some of the other students teased him by saying, ' Man! You can't preach!'
At this point Dr. Gray walked passed and overheard the young man responding in the following manner: 'I can preach just as good as anyone of you can preach! In fact I can even preach better than some of you!'
Dr. Gray laughed and cleaned his throat a litte and then remarked: 'Suddenly the young man was no longer the hole in the doughnut!'
I'll never forget that story...
Whenever I think I'm the doughnut, I remember that image.
Isaiah talks about the sieve of pride and those who say they are 'Holier than thou'. The African Americans at The Valley used to talk about some people who were, 'holier than thou; deeper than deep; too high to come by!'
Sport is a wonderful leveler. Just when you think you are unbeatable you have a bad day! There are a few exceptions like Tiger Woods who just seem to get better and better as he grows older. But he revealed the other day that he never thought he would have 9 major golf titles behind his name at the age of 32 - some humility in that statement, don't you think?
Pride comes before the fall. That is not a saying - that is the truth. We have all experienced in some way or another. The person walking with their nose in the air, cannot see the banana peel on the pavement and the consequences are appalling!
When they said The Titanic was unsinkable, an iceberg proved them wrong...a piece of ice sunk a ship! When Muhammed Ali kept announcing that he was the unbeatable champion of the world, he got knocked out and suffers Alzheimers disease for the rest of his life. When John Lennon claimed that the Beatles were more popular than Jesus Christ he was gunned down by a madman. The moment Lucifer wanted to take over the throne of God he was cast down like lightning from heaven. When Herod spoke like a god, and people honoured him as one, he fell down and worms ate him up. Horror of horrors!
Well, we are all flesh and have nothing to boast about, that is really all I am saying. When someone else falls, we should not rejoice but go and help to pick them up. He who stands should take care that he does not fall in the same way as the person he is judging.
How quickly this life passess...like a shuttle, says Job, a shooting star through the air, and it is gone. Moses says it passes like a shadow. He described his eventful 120 years as a hand width...

I love a crispy doughnut with some icing on it! But whenever I eat one I am reminded of this story and it is a good time to take stock of one's own life. Our own assessments of our lives are not always accurate. That is why our Good Shepherd sometimes allows trials and temptations to come in situations we would not have chosen for ourselves or for our dear ones, so that we can be reminded that we have nothing to boast of in the flesh.

All we have and all we are have been graciously given to us. We are simply to be grateful for what God has allowed in our lives. We receive correction from him and take the instruction that adversity and suffering bring. Our faith is tempered by these things.

In a moment of disappointment remember to look for the mercy of God in it: it is by His grace that we are not consumed, because we are like the flower of the grass, today it is here and blossomes, then the wind blows over it, and it is gone!

But in the midst of this temporary state of being, we have an option to add eternal value to our lives by putting our faith in Christ's offering for the sin of mankind: by believing he died for me, He imparts eternal life into my being and I have this hope in me that I will forever be with the Lord, no matter what happens after this life!

So, in myself I am just the hole in the doughnut, but in Christ, I add taste to life! But because I know my source and substance, I am thankful for the opportunities offered to me daily to do what I can do in order to be a shining light for Jesus, in spite of my own deficiencies and weaknesses. All the glory of any achievement goes to my Maker. I am nothing without Him.

He is the real doughnut! He is the Master Piece of God's Creation! He is everything to me!